Our long-term aim is to empower parents so that they feel that they can do exactly what we’re doing outside of our reading sessions, which is supporting and encouraging their children to read for pleasure and gain confidence reading independently. We’re not experts either, we just love books! So, even though it’s great for parents to grab a break during the reading session, ultimately, we want them to be a part of it.
Why is it important to include parents/carers during visits?
Getting to know the parents we visit each week is as equally important as reading with the children and will not only help in the end result of building a child’s confidence in reading but will also build a whole picture of the family and the tailored support they may need in relation to their child’s reading. This can take time, especially as you get started with a new family and build a relationship with them. The best way is to be interested and open, and to let them know you love reading with their children.
Below are some things to think about:
- Remain sensitive to a family’s needs
- Always ask for consent
- Involve parents/carers in reading
- Ask for their advice
- Praise children in front of them
- Be persistent (in a gentle way)
- Reinforce praise if parents overcorrect
- Make the session fun
- Find out if they enjoy reading with their child
- Find out areas to focus on
1. Remain sensitive to a family’s needs
Our key guidance is to always remain sensitive to a family’s needs. It might be that a parent is particularly busy and doesn’t feel like chatting with us during the session one week, and participation may change week to week. Be patient in your relationship building, and always offer for the parent to stay at the start. For example “We did some amazing reading last week, would you like to stay and hear what we’ve been reading so far?”. You can also ask to say goodbye to them at the end of the session, to feedback on how the session went, and invite them to stay for next weeks’ one. This way they can make a plan to join, for example, if they’re caring for other siblings.
2. Always ask for consent
We always ask for consent from Parents/Carers at the start of a session, so this is a great time to initiate a conversation and have a quick chat. Show an interest in them, asking questions such as “How are you? How was your weekend?”, “do you have any plans for the weekend?” or following up on something they mentioned the start of the previous session. Try to start a conversation that they may respond to/be interested in having. It doesn’t always have to be about their children.
3. Involve parents/carers in reading
Involving Parents/Carers can be a great way to not only start to build trust with the children, but is also particularly helpful if you are splitting the session with multiple children or have shy and reluctant readers. They will know their children best and can be an encouraging figure as you get started reading with them.
4. Ask for their advice
Ask parents’ advice to show we value their opinion. Involve them in the choice of books. For example, you can say “we’re starting/continuing with [book] today – have they read it before? Do they like books/stories like this?” You can also ask children to show their choice to their parents. At the beginning of the session, while getting their permission, if you’re not sure about the suitability of a particular book- because of its themes or reading level, then definitely ask the parent to look at it and decide. Listen to their answer to show that we value their opinion. It can also be helpful if there are particular subjects parents don’t want their child to read.
5. Praise children in front of them
Praise children in front of their parents – their parents should be proud and valued too. If the parents don’t join you throughout the session, make sure you keep them updated on what you’ve been doing. For example you can say “They tried really hard on some tricky words”, or “They made great expressions today when reading”. Be sure to feedback what books you’ve read from; what their children have done well. Even better, invite the children to explain as well.
6. Be persistent (in a gentle way)
Use gentle persistence and don’t give up on a parent who may consistently be offscreen. Make a point of keeping in touch with them – by chatting when they first dial in to the online session and asking if they’d like to stay and hear their child read, then you can slowly invite them to participate. For example you could say “[Child] did such wonderful reading last week, we’d love for you to hear a bit today, and see what they’ve accomplished!”. A parent may also stay for the session, but prefer to be offscreen, so you may not see them – you can check in with them at different parts of the session, for example by asking the child at the start to recap to the parent what they did/read previously. As well as also asking the child, you can ask the parent “What do you think will happen next?” or “How is [Character] feeling/behaving?”
7. Reinforce praise if parents overcorrect
Equally, some parents may stay for the sessions, and potentially over-correct any mistakes their child may make on tricky or new words. This can sometimes affect a child’s confidence reading aloud, and not give them the opportunity to have a go and be ok with making mistakes. You can support this by re-enforcing praise. For example, if a parent corrects a word they get wrong and says “no, that’s wrong” or “that wasn’t right” – you can say to the child “that was a really good go!” or “it can be tricky sometimes, let’s give it another try” – and then model sounding it out; then congratulating them on getting it right.
8. Make the session fun
Make the session fun: for example, by using silly voices on different characters, commenting on the pictures, counting, asking questions about characters. For example, “What can you see in the pictures?”, or if you get to a suspenseful part of a story, asking them “What do you think will happen next?” If you’re not afraid to be a bit silly during the session, it may help parents feel comfortable doing the same when they’re reading with their children. You could also invite parents to join in the fun – they might provide funny voices or noises for instance or explain the meaning of something.
Encouraging parents and using the above strategies in the sessions is also helpful, if for example, a child chooses not to read aloud in session, or prefers to be read to. There may also be sessions where a child wants to read a simpler book than they may usually read (for example, a shorter story, or picture book). Using different voices for characters, and asking questions can help extend their reading experience.
9. Find out if they enjoy reading with their child
Tactfully and over time, find out if parents enjoy reading with their child. You can ask questions like “What kind of stories do you enjoy reading together?” – so that you can bring more next time, and also a good note for the book gifting.
For the first few sessions when reading with a new family, it’s best to observe and take note. Some Doorstep Library parents will be confident regularly encouraging reading with their children, however not all parents are confident readers themselves, or there may be language barriers. Be careful not to invite a parent to read a page until you know they’ll be comfortable with that.
10. Find out areas to focus on
Find out from a parent if there’s anything specific to practise, for instance, tricky words, or reading certain books from school. You can also find out from parents about their child’s school, and if teachers have commented on changes in their reading. However, remember not to pass judgement or make assumptions on their own education experience. If a parent is talking about a negative experience, just listen and say something like “I see”.
Final thoughts
Thank you for all your time and support in helping us share the joy of reading with so many families! We hope these tips are useful for your sessions. If you are having difficulty engaging a parent over time, you can always speak to your Project Leader after the visit, and they will be able to help with specific suggestions and circumstances to support you and your volunteer partner.